Tuesday, 20 June 2017

Tuesday's Tale - Manspreading

Trains were quieter at 2pm, just after the lunch rush, but before students escaped from school for the day.  Two cars down held a mother with several noisy toddlers. Next car over had three commuters, engrossed in their phones.

This car, besides myself, enjoyed the silence of emptiness, until Aubin Grove cursed us with another passenger.

I did not care to know his name, nor desired any further acquaintance. Yet he insisted on sitting next to me--to me!--in the  middle of an empty train car. No decent person did that. The rule was that if you were not the only person in a public space, it was up to you and everyone else to fill up the space as evenly as possible. Strangers did not cluster together.

He was not a decent person. He even manspread, as if he'd forgotten to dry his balls completely this morning after his shower and had to let them air out, lest they develop a nasty condition.

I gave him The Look. You know the one. We all communicate with strangers with The Look. Dude, you're in my space, my eyes said.

He knew what I was saying. He glanced at me, then looked away, clearly dismissing me.

I knew that cut. Men did it all the time. It was an admonishment, that if I didn't like what he was doing, then I could move.

No way. I was here first.

I leaned over. "Dude, you're sitting in Mike's spot." I looked around as if afraid of being overheard.

That got me another glance and a sneer. With my finger I began counting invisible spots on his shirtsleeve. "Mike doesn't like people sitting in his spot. That's why I sat here, to the side."

Now I got his full attention.

Four, five, six, I silently mouthed as I counted my way up his sleeve. He pulled his arm away, but I kept counting. It wasn't until I got to twelve, that I paused. "See, Mike sits there, Barney is on the other side."  I pointed across the train. "Darren and Karen are over there, but they never argue, and Wilson keeps his own company over here." I gestured to my other side. "Anywhere else is safe to sit."

I resumed my counting of invisible dots on his sleeve. Even when he moved away, I leaned over until I reached twelve.  Then I started again at one.

Sure enough, he got up and moved, not to another seat, but out of the car completely.

That's right, dude. My brand of crazy outranks your brand of assholery.

Her Grace can now go back to working on her novel.

Sunday, 18 June 2017

Didn't get into #pg70pit

Nope, didn't get into #pg70pit (aka #70pit17) either.

Surely my work isn't THAT bad, is it?

Could be.

Doesn't help when people attempt to "comfort" me by telling me Harry Potter was rejected twelve times before Bloomsbury picked up up.

Oh, only a mere twelve times? I've got a spreadsheet listing more than ten times that in rejection for Of The Dark, many of them form rejections. I do take a bit of professional reassurance that I don't have any of the scathing rejections that some authors get. Any personalised rejections I do get, especially from full requests, say nice things. I get a lot of "I like it, and you're really good at [x], but I'm afraid it's not quite right for my list."

This is the sort of feedback that drives an author to drink self-publish.

Her Grace is considering the indie route with OTD, and possibly going straight to Victoria Arden for snagging an agent.

Thursday, 8 June 2017

A Clarification of Definitions

So I'm throwing my hat into a three-ring circus this month with all the pitch contests.  One consistent quality is that each entrant has to define their genre.  Always useful.

I'm pitching a Fantasy Romance, but not every contest has #FR as a category. Do I cringe and stick a #PR tag on it, or do I be true to the novel and double-tag it with #F and #R?  I've been doing the latter, because Of The Dark, despite it's magic, is definitely NOT a Paranormal Romance.

There is a difference between Paranormal Romance and Fantasy Romance.

  • Paranormal Romance is a real world with a layer of magic over it. 
  • Fantasy Romance is a fantasy world (sometimes a second world, alternate reality or otherworld) with magic in it.

If you take all the magical stuff out of your world, and left everything else behind, how would your Romance be categorised?  If you remove the vampires and the shifters et al., you'd be left with a contemporary Romance. Take magic out of a Fantasy Romance, you've still got a Fantasy Romance.

I can't call an otherworld Fantasy Romance a "Paranormal", because there's no "normal" to para.

Her Grace finds these contests fun, but doesn't eschew the Original Contest of sending a query to an agent the old-fashioned way.

Wednesday, 7 June 2017

Today's Contest: #pg70pit

Yep, it's June, when the first half of the summer* contests take place. (The second half happens in August. Nothing happens in July, because nobody can be bothered.)

Today it's the Page 70 Pitch contest.  Take page 70 of your completed, polished ms, and see if it's got any voice. Tweet a seven-word desc of your MC and hope it has voice.

Hope the bonheure of the universe favours your entry being selected, and the lucky winners get their entries perused by agents who may make requests.

So my hat is in the ring, along with a secret code name I cannot reveal and the book I hope to reveal to the whole world.

Now that I've submitted my entry and tweeted my tweet, I am having serious doubts about my voice.

I will not give in to my whiny muse. I will finish my WIP before I attempt to fix OTD's voice. In fact, I might write another book, then have a look at OTD's voice.

*Summer... when Her Grace say "summer", she really means Cancerian summer, as experienced by the Northern Hemisphere (June, July, August).  For Her Grace, who lives Down Under, Capricornian summer (Birak and Bunuru) happens in December, January, February.

So yeah. Right now it's cold and miserable in her part of Australia. And dark.

Friday, 2 June 2017

After my word cloud yesterday, I saw this twitter thread and I pondered on a personalised rejection I received last week and I wondered if I was missing something in my first chapter.

I must be, though I cannot think what that is.

The rejection said that my first chapter didn't have a hook.

Really? Howzat?  The first chapter's all about the triggers and the inciting incident. The first trigger happens on the first page. My MC realises something, wonders if this new realisation will solve a problem she has, and it does. Just as she applies that solution, she's thrust into another, more dire situation, where this same solution solves this second problem. However, this solution has consequenses, which come visit her at the end of Chapter One, thus sending her life into snafu-land.

Then I wondered if the clues I'd dropped in weren't obvious enough, that my first chapter might have been too 'quiet', as they say.

A quiet book is not the same as a dull book. Everything you want is there, but it's subtle. Sometimes you've got to work for it, or maybe you'll be five chapters down the track before the penny drops, but the penny always drops.

You know how in Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince he comes across a cabinet of stuff, and one of the items is a locket?  Of course not. Nobody really noticed the locket, as it was shown as setting. But then in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, you learn it's a frickin' horcrux!  The introduction of the locket is quiet, but it becomes a significant McGuffin later on.

Readers like to be trusted, even if they might gloss over a clue, only to realise it later.  To beat them over the head with every plot point is like telling them they're too stupid to figure the plot out. They don't like that. They like to feel clever, and trusted, and to lose themselves in the world.

Our Heroine has always seen how everything in the world is connected together. Think of it as everything between string theory and galaxy filaments. She's seen them her whole life, and never thought that others might not see them. But her "ah-ha" moment is when she realises that not only can she see them, but she can touch them as well, move them, pull on them, and affect the universe like that. Cool trick.

Not less than five minutes later, she needs to help rescue someone from drowning. She realises this nifty new trick can save a life, and she does so without hesitation. However, such powers come with a price. Her actions attract the attention of a dark god, one who's been looking for her her whole life. Now that she's pretty much announced her presence, he's able to locate her. Inciting incident. Everything from here on out is fubar country.

Her "ah-ha" moment is subtle, though, and readers might not understand its significance until later on in the chapter. Is that what's working against my favour?

Does a hook have to have a barb?

So I'm wondering: what's not grabbing people with my first chapter... forget that, what's wrong with my first page?  I honestly cannot improve on where I've started the plot. It is the best place to start it. But if I can't hook a reader with the first "ah ha" moment, what am I doing wrong?

Her Grace is baffled.

Thursday, 1 June 2017

Wordle of Alasograms

Based on a comment on this post, I made a word cloud of my last dozen query rejections for Of The Dark.

Anything in particular stand out to you?

Individually, rejections don't bother me. A few hundred start to nag, though. Mostly, I am baffled as to why several hundred agents fail to recognise the brilliant work I've sent them. *shrug*

Her Grace shall continue to query until she runs out of reputable agents. By then, the next book will be polished and she can start all over again.

Saturday, 27 May 2017

Alas, no #QueryKombat for me

Sad to say I didn't get into QueryKombat this year.

Oh well. Over three hundred fifty of us entered for a chance of 64 spots to battle for the attention of an agent.

Even though I didn't get in, I'm going to keep following, as I want to see what everyone else's queries look like.  If I am to be beaten, I want to be beaten by the best.

Meanwhile, I'll keep querying, because that's what you do until you run out of agents.

Her Grace's week hasn't been all losses.  Her Astronomy project "Wet Mars, Dry Mars, White Mars..." receieved an HD (that's an A for those of you who don't know what a High Distinction is).

Tuesday, 16 May 2017

Going in to Battle with Query Kombat

Since I haven't participated in a query contest since... oh, last year, I thought I'd give Query Kombat a go.

There's three hosts this year:  Laura, Michelle and Michael.  I'm familiar with Michelle from QueryWars.

So I had a look through the list of agents participating and am not sure if I should be delighted or worried that I am familiar with most of their names.  I've queried many of them in the past, only to get form rejections. I wonder if my query sucks?

There's also a Proboards Forum with all sorts of nifty helpfulness.  Hoping I can get some feedback on my query before I go into battle.

I love the OWW and have been on it for years decades, but they don't have a category for getting feedback on your query letters.

Her Grace is ignoring her Astronomy final exam for the nonce to get some Query Kombat stuff done.

Tuesday, 9 May 2017

Tuesday's Tale - Taking Advantage

Not all disasters were the same. Some were slow and take time to develop. Others, like today's, were quick and sudden. Nobody knew it was coming. Dust and panicked screams filled the air, blocking Sadie's understanding of what happened. She couldn't see the other side of the street, and didn't know if she wanted to cross. The tall buildings of the city loomed over her. Of course, she looked up, in case something nine-eleventy was happening. 

Only the rising of smoke, no falling debris. A businesswoman clitter-clattered past her, too frightened to think to kick off her heels before fleeing. Other people dashed about, while some clustered together on the ground; first aiders tending to the wounded.

What was it? Bomb? Accident? Runaway car? She needed to know. Sadie moved forward, her hands clutched in front of her. Her boss would ask, her friends would ask.... he would demand. She needed--

Her feet slowed. So many people lying about, especially closer to the building that... what? exploded? was attacked?  Who knew? Probably no one would know, at least, not for some time.

No one would know. A newswoman's voice spoke in the back of her head: "The death toll rose today as emergency workers struggled to find any more survivors of today's disaster..."

Some disasters were quick, and needed immediate action.  Others, like her marriage, were slow, and required planning.

She'd planned. Dani had helped her, had even volunteered to keep Sadie's Safe Bag in her bike locker under her apartment building. Dani had put a combination lock on there, so Sadie would never have a key confiscated from her.

He'd driven her into work, dropped her off right at the front door, then drove away after she'd gone inside. Sadie had come out at lunchtime, for she'd once found five dollars in the lobby. Instead of adding it to the FU Fund, she'd kept it for a time when she needed reminding that life could be so much more than the brown paper bag lunch he watched her make that morning. Sheer coincidence she was outside when a sudden disaster struck. Her coworkers would innocently explain this to the police, who would then explain it to him.

And what could he do?  Nothing. He would never know she'd taken advantage of a sudden disaster to escape a slow one. Perhaps he would have no reason to consider finding her.

Dani would know, when she discovered the locker empty. As tempted as she was, Sadie left no note.

She had to leave quickly. Everyone's focus would be on the disaster for the next day or so. Public transport out of town, to the farthest suburb, then maybe a bus to somewhere else.  Jersey? Too close. Arizona? Dunno.  Maybe up to Canada on her way to Alaska? Work a few cash-only jobs, then head off overseas.

No rush. By the time someone thought to inquire after her, she'd be well and truly away.

And this was how the rest of her life would play out:  Identity theft.

Dani came up with this one. Sadie didn't ask how, but Dani acquired an identity for her, birth certificate, passport, and more. These she'd hold on to for later.

Several months after fleeing, Sadie would get several credit cards in her original name, rack up ridiculous bills, get "caught", let them discover her "original identity", and get prosecuted for it. If she balanced it right, a misdemeanor, with some jail time.  (He couldn't get her while she was in jail.) Released on good behaviour, tap into the system for help in rehabilitation back into society, then attempt to live out the rest of her life under her new identity as some waitress in some small city.

Sadie coughed through the cloud of dust. The sounds of sirens pierced through the dust.  Help had arrived.  Police officers pushed her back, telling her to get off the street, to go inside.

She would never return to her office, daily haven that it was. 26-33-19. That was the combination of Dani's lock. New clothes, new papers, new life awaited her.

Her Grace would like you to know that any connection between this story and any recent disasters is purely coincidental. She wrote this story many months ago and scheduled it for today, as the time was too sensitive to post this earlier. Be well.

Monday, 8 May 2017

A to Z Challenge Reflection

(Apologies for the long post. I learned a lot.)

I learn new things whenever I do the A to Z challenge. I employed the lessons I learned last time, and it made for a better go-around this year.

What I Learned

  1. Pre-planning. I pre-planned my theme and populated my alphabet. I then did my posts ahead of time (when I could, on my own time) and scheduled them to post on the correct day. This pre-planning really helped A LOT. Most of my posts were done by the end of March.
  2. Audience. I thought about what audience I wanted to cater to, and this helped me focus my posts and have a consistency throughout. I wanted to make my posts interesting to an audience with varying levels of education. I tried to design them so people who didn't know much about astronomy could understand my concepts, yet be intricate enough to push those who had a bit more knowledge about the subject.
  3. Consistency. I wanted a certain level of quality control, so you pretty much knew what you'd get from post to post. Again, I was able to pull this off through pre-planning.

    That said... the topic I chose is completely not relevant to my usual blog. My blog's about writing books generally and Romance specifically. So what topic did I choose?  Astronomy!! The two rarely cross paths (except in a novel of mine that's coming out next year). Why did I choose my topic?
  4. Stand out. I wanted to stand out and offer something unique that the other AtoZers weren't offering. And while there were a few who tackled the same subject, none of them approached it in the same way I did, and that was good. I didn't feel I was duplicating anyone else's efforts. I thought if I blogged about writing,  I'd get lost in the crowd. Probably was right, as there were quite a few writers writing about writing. However, I might go back to that next year and pull a Frain.

A to Z Changes

Part of the A to Z Challenge involves reading others' blogs. This year the Challenge ran a few things differently--no Linky List! This was a boon and a bane.

Boon: No long list of people who'd signed up, then never bothered to blog. You only heard about the people who were being active, and could go straight to their posts.

Bane: Having to post EVERY SINGLE DAY to the AtoZ blog to let people know you had stuff up. I don't get online every day, so this became quite a pain. I wish one could schedule comments the way one schedules blog posts. Since most of my entries were completed ahead of time, it would have been nice not to have to get online every single day to promote my blog. Also, if I came across an interesting blog, and forgot to Favourite it, I'd have to trawl through the blog comments to find it again.

I'd love to see a combination of the old Linky List with the new Blog Comment format. Bring back the Linky List, but you can only get on the Linky List if you've posted an entry. Then, post a weekly Linky List blog post where, if we posted entries that week, we can list them. The pre-registering is probably too much

I was amazed at how many bloggers there were who couldn't figure out how to make a simple anchor tag work, even when shown how.

Also, the absolutely best way to make me scroll past a comment on the A-to-Z daily letter blog post? Posting this:

 . Here is my blog.

Nothing is more boring than that. At the very least post your theme. No, not your name, or even your blog's name, but your theme.  That's what I'm looking for.  Roslyn Core announced how she was cross stitching a Buffy the Vampire Slayer alphabet.  You bet your sweet bippy that got my attention! (No, I'm not a Buffy fan, or a cross stitch fan. But what a juxtaposition!)

What Worked and What Didn't from This Reader's Perspective

What worked for me was a blog that was regular-ish, that had a clearly defined theme or topic, and provided interesting content.

Regular posts is good, because nothing is more disappointing than to come back day after day to find nothing new. That's a good way to lose me.

A clearly defined topic is necessary. It lets me know what to expect on a blog. Now, some topics simply didn't catch my interest because I wasn't their target audience. But the few posts I read were well put together and if I was interested in that, I would have definitely stuck around to read more.

What definitely turned me off were the "personal" or "inspirational" blogs that chronicles someone's inner journey. A lot of people did these, and frankly, I found them very boring. Topics like these are excellent for an audience of one. For the rest of us, "You" are not a sufficiently interesting topic. I'm sorry. Blog entries like "Gratitude" or "Spirituality" only have impact for you.

I noticed there were quite a few story blogs as well, writers posting fiction. Author J R Vicente had a clever "choose your own adventure" style, where the commenters got to choose what the blog post would be for the next day. She gets points for that.

Most of the fiction blogs couldn't hold my attention because the voice wasn't compelling enough. Sometimes I'm not your audience, and sometimes your writing's not as good as you think it is. Fortunately, the more you write, the better you get. I would never tell someone to stop writing simply because they weren't good.

And then there were some story blogs that completely blew me out of the water. John Frain. John Frickin' Manuscript Frain. If you didn't read any of his AtoZ this April, go back and read it. If you've read NOTHING ELSE this month, go back and read John Frain.

Frain wrote a flash fiction story a day, with him as a character that got killed. Every. Single. Time. (or did he?)

I don't think I will forget that one for a long time to come.

Blogs I Enjoyed

It's always fun going through the different blogs and see what others have posted. Some of the more memorable blogs this year were:

I read one blogger, who was rather new to blogging, never mind the A to Z Challenge. No, she didn't post every day, and that was understandable. She wrote about being a single parent to a high-needs child after a bitter divorce. Hers was a deep story about a hard life and I'm glad I got to read it. But can I find it again? No. I want to know how her story ends.

There were a few others I popped in from time to time.  Overall, there were plenty of great blogs to read.

Her Grace will now be crawling back under a rock, as May is a very busy month for her in the Real World.

Monday, 1 May 2017

A to Z - I'm done!

And that's all, folks!

Thanks for coming on a tour of the universe with me. I hope you learned something about astronomy and weren't too overwhelmed by the hardcore science.

The skies above us are a fascinating place, one I've loved for nearly half a century. I encourage you to go out and look up tonight. What can you identify that you couldn't a month ago?  Any new celestial favourites?

While this blog is mostly for me to ramble on about Romance and writing and reviews and my own books (Buy my books!), it's also a place to post about what I love. For the month of April, that was astronomy.

Never be afraid to look beyond the world you know and try something new.

Her Grace shall always love the stars.

Sunday, 30 April 2017

Z is for Zodiac

This isn't about telling your horoscope, but knowing where the Sun is at any particular time of the year. (Those born under the sign of Ophiuchus the Snake-bearer know that Astrology is not a science because nobody has been able to prove its reasoning through the scientific method.)

In Astronomy, there are thirteen constellations that reside along the ecliptic (the path the Sun takes through the sky year-round). This means as the Sun moves through the sky from month to month, it will be found within the boundaries of certain constellations.

Astrologically, the sky is divided into twelve "houses" of 30° each. In astronomy, the constellations of the astronomical zodiac is not so evenly divided, and we've thrown in one more constellation because the Sun does spend some time in one corner of it. The planets and the Moon also move within the ecliptic.

Because the Earth is tilted, the ecliptic doesn't match up with the equator except on equinoxes twice a year.

The red line is the path the Sun takes. The green line is the equator.

When it comes to measuring where stuff is in the sky, there's two axes of celestial coordinates: declination (DEC) and right ascension (RA).

Declination measures north/south in degrees: North (90°) to Equator (0°) to South (-90°).
Right ascension measures eastward from a point of origin (the vernal/spring equinox) in hours, with there being 24 hours in a full circle, due to the rotation of the Earth. This is because astronomers measure right ascension by timing when an object passes through the highest point in the sky, or the meridian. Each hour is about 15° in width.

Anything anywhere in the sky can be given a set of coordinates.

Looking at the star of Betelgeuse:  DEC +07° 24′, RA 05h 55m

This means Betelgeuse sits about seven degrees north of the equator, and on the spring equinox (21 March), it takes about five hours and fifty-five minutes before it reaches the meridian of the sky.

Let's look at the Zodiac astronomically.

Here's the actual map:

As you can see, the constellations take up different areas of real estate. Sometimes the Sun will spend as little as a few days in some constellations and several weeks in others.

Right ascension starts on the spring equinox and is also called the "First Point in Aries"... however, due to precession, the spring equinox actually lies in Pisces today!  Here's how much it's shifted over the past seven thousand years:

(A brief word about something called precession: the Earth wobbles on a long-term cycle of about 26,000 years, where her north pole points to different parts of the sky. (Polaris isn't always going to be the North Star.) Because of this, the constellations have shifted from where they were originally observed a few thousand years ago, and don't line up with the calendar we know and love today. Your astrological zodiac sign no longer corresponds with the constellation of the same name. Sorry.)

We'll start on the vernal equinox and have a look at all the Zodiac constellations.

Constellation:Coordinates:Sun enters/exits:Time in constellation:
Pisces RA: 1h DEC: 5°12 March – 18 April38 days
Aries RA: 2h DEC: 15° 19 April - 13 May25 days
Taurus RA: 4h DEC: 15° 14 May - 19 June37 days
Gemini RA: 7h DEC: 20° 20 June - 20 July31 days
Cancer RA: 9h DEC: 20° 21 July - 9 Aug20 days
Leo RA: 11h DEC: 15° 10 Aug - 15 Sept37 days
Virgo RA:13h DEC:0° 16 Sept - 30 Oct45 days
Libra RA: 15h DEC: -15° 31 Oct - 22 Nov23 days
Scorpio RA: 17h DEC: -30° 23 Nov - 29 Nov7 days
Ophiuchus RA: 17h DEC:-30° 30 Nov - 17 Dec18 days
Sagittarius RA: 19h DEC: -25° 18 Dec - 18 Jan32 days
Capricorn RA: 21h DEC: -20° 19 Jan - 15 Feb28 days
Aquarius RA: 22h DEC: -10° 16 Feb - 11 March24 days

Which is your favourite zodiac constellation?

What is your astrological zodiac sign, and what is your astronomical zodiac constellation (based on your birthday)?

Her Grace is fond of Scorpius, because it really does look like a scorpion.

If you wish to explore more Astrological applications of the Zodiac, check out Chris Votey's "Madness of a Modern writer" A to Z challenge where he's been combining the Greek and Chinese Zodiacs to create character profiles.  It's been fun for me, from a writer's point of view.

Saturday, 29 April 2017

Y is for Year

Happy Birthday to you, if you happen to have a birthday this year. (Sorry, Leap Year Babies. No birthday cake for you.)

Essentially, a year is the time it takes for the Earth to go around the Sun. So yes, Venus has a Venusian year (0.6a) and Mars has a Martian year (1.88a). But for the purpose of today, I'm going to talk about how the Year is a standard unit of measurement.

Astronomers need a way of measuring things. Since there's no standard galactic measuring stick for, well, everything, we've taken what's most familiar and made that our basis. For example, the mass of planets is measured by the mass of the Earth (M) and the mass of stars is measured by the mass of the Sun (M). Short distances are measured by Astronomical Units (AU), which is the mean distance from the Earth to the Sun and long distances are measured by lightyears (ly) (the distance it takes for light to travel a year).

In astronomy, one measurement of time is the Julian year (symbol: a), which is exactly 86,400 seconds (as seconds are the base unit of time in SI). This equates to about 365.25 days, if that makes your brain hurt less. That's a very familiar number, with our calendar years being 365 days, except for every four years, when we add up the .25 of a day, and tack on an extra Leap day, so our days can sync up with our years. Our current Gregorian Calendar is based off this cycle.

While we've known about this extra quarter-day for a few thousand years, we didn't realise exactly how precise we'd not calculated it, so our earlier calendars had a bit of drift going on, and occasionally needed serious correction. That's why the ten days of Oct 5-15 1582 AD (CE) don't actually exist. Also why Ramadan appears to drift in relation to our civil calendars. And if you were born in Sweden in February 30, 1712, I am very, very sorry for you. Here's three hundred years' worth of birthday cake to make up for that double-leap day.

Let's put calendars aside and talk astronomy.

Julian years are used to measure duration. For example, how long would it take light to reach us from Alpha Centauri? About 4.6 years. (A Julian year is what they use to calculate a lightyear.)

How long does it take for Jupiter to go around the Sun (aka a Jovian year)?  11.8618 (Julian) years.

There's other types of years such as the sidereal, tropical and draconic years, used to measure stuff in relation to Earth but for general astronomical purposes in measuring duration in the rest of the Universe, we prefer the Julian year. Feel free to go hardcore if you wish regarding the other year types.

Her Grace does not mind collecting years as she goes along. Old age is a privilege denied to many.

Friday, 28 April 2017

X is for X-ray

Finally, an AtoZ blog entry where I don't have to stretch to find an entry.

We've talked a bit about the electromagnetic spectrum during the A to Z--RadioInfrared, Visible (Optical) and Ultraviolet--because light is primarily the only tool we have to explore the universe.

While other bloggers are really pushing it to find something for the letter X, here's something that comes naturally to astronomers: X-rays

We all know about X-rays for their medical uses: broken a bone or been to the dentist, chances are you had an X-ray photograph taken.

X-rays are cool because they can penetrate certain types of matter and show us other types. This is because they're highly energetic. Naturally, this is a good thing for astronomers. We like looking at high-energy things.

X-rays were discovered in 1895 by Wilhelm Röntgen. Here's his original paper: German,  English Translation

"Hand mit ringen," Will said.
His wife said, "I have seen my death!"  Drama queen.
In fact, X-rays are often called Röntgen rays. What did Wilhelm Röntgen call them?  X-rays, with X standing for "mysterious", because he really wasn't sure what they were at first. Eventually he and a few scientists figured it out.  A few early articles about Röntgen's mysterious X-rays.

And, like any other scientist that thought science stuff was nifty, he played around with it, and even freaked his wife out by using her hand as a guinea pig by taking the first X-ray photograph.

This was fascinating, as it's really the image of an X-ray shadow, as the minerals of the bones block out the X-rays. Lead is also good for blocking out X-rays.

So, what makes X-rays so useful for astronomy?

Remember how stars come in different colours, depending on how hot they are?  If you boost the temperature of an object in outer space to waaay hot (more than a million Kelvin), its peak colour goes on beyond blue all the way up into X-rays.

This makes X-rays really useful for detecting high-energy events and objects.  Neutron stars and accreting black holes emit X-rays. Supernovae emit X-rays. (Stars emit X-rays, as they emit through the whole EM spectrum, though not to the same degree the Really Powerful Stuff, like active galactic nuclei, does.) Want to know where all the moving and shaking is happening in the universe?  Look for the bright X-ray spots.

Now, X-rays are absorbed by our atmosphere (thankfully), so any X-ray observatories need to be in orbit, like the Chandra X-Ray Observatory.

Here's some cool pictures taken in X-ray:

Looks very different from the hand mit ringen, as these are not images of the shadows of X-rays, but rather the emissions of X-rays. That's why they're so bright.

Her Grace once calculated how much X-rays she emitted. Answer: not much.

Thursday, 27 April 2017

W is for Wobble

Lots of things wobble. This is due to gravitational influence by something else.

Mass has gravity, and gravity is a very social thing. Two bits of mass spy each other across the room (or the universe) and try to get closer. If they get close enough, they end up in an orbit around each other, possibly in a spiral until they collapse together, though this doesn't always happen if the escape velocity is sufficient to keep them from falling into each other.  (That's what most orbits are: falling, but failing to hit the ground.)

The centre of gravity about which these object spiral about is called the barycenter.

Looks like this:
Do-si-do.  The barycenter is the red cross in the middle.
When the objects are of a similar size, the barycenter will be somewhere in between the two objects, as is the case with Pluto and Charon:

Pluto and Charon and their barycenter, the cross in the middle.
Pluto has a small orbit around the barycenter while Charon has a larger one. So they kind of wobble like an uneven barbell.  Because the barycenter is outside of Pluto, some people would like to call Pluto/Charon a double planet, rather than a planet and a satellite. I'm cool with that.

When one object is distinctly more massive than the other, the barycenter will be located within the larger object, such as the Earth and the Moon:

This gives the Earth a little bit of a wobble, instead of a full-on do-si-do.

We noticed our Sun has a bit of a wobble, due to the gravitational influence of the planets about it. In fact, the Sun's wobbled quite a bit:
Notice how sometimes the barycenter's inside the sun and sometimes its not?

Yeah, not surprising, considering what we know about gravity. Then some clever soul thought, if our Sun wobbles due to planets pulling on it, wouldn't other stars wobble for the same reason?

Whoa! Mind blown! So we started looking at nearby stars with this Wobble Method (also called Radial Velocity or Doppler Spectroscopy Methods) to see if they had a wobble.

Ohmigosh, they did! Thus, we discovered exoplanets.  And we said, "That's so cool!!!" (Then we felt slightly stupid because we hadn't figured something so simple out until now.)

Gamma Cephei Ab was the first exoplanet detected in 1989 (confirmed in 2002), and since then, we've uncovered evidence for thousands of exoplanets.

Nice to know we're not alone.

Now, there's lots of other methods for detecting exoplanets, but it all started with noticing how gravity made things wobble.

Wobbling isn't just for detecting exoplanets. Lots of other discoveries are due to the observation of wobbliness.  Go hardcore and check out wobbliness from asteroids with moons to entire galaxy clusters.  Even browsing through the list of titles is fascinating. Never be afraid to read an abstract. Save your freaking out for the paper itself.

Her Grace believes that love makes the world go round, but gravity rules the universe.

Wednesday, 26 April 2017

V is for Visible Spectrum

Until the past century, pretty much all astronomical work took place with the observance of the visible spectrum. MK-1 Eyeball (the naked eye) was how observation took place.

The visible spectrum isn't terribly big--only 390 to 700 nm--considering just how wide the electromagnetic spectrum is. Yet within that short range, we've been able to accomplish some magnificent astronomy.

Before we discovered calorific rays (infrared) or chemical rays (ultraviolet), we were playing with the visible spectrum. Spectroscopy allowed us to divide up light into its different wavelengths and observe the universe. You can tell a lot about the composition of something by the frequency and amplitude of the light it emits.

Early scientists (like Herschel), noticed that certain spectra had dark lines. These are absorption lines, when atoms (like hydrogen) absorb certain light frequency.

Johann Balmer noticed that hydrogen absorbed certain frequencies. This helped us discover just how much hydrogen was out there, and also determine the nature of the hydrogen atom itself. (Hardcore: the absorption lines happen when a hydrogen electron absorbs that photon's energy, thus causing it to jump or transition to the next electron shell.)

All elements exhibit absorption lines. While some are seen only "off-stage" (ie, in the infrared or ultrviolet or beyond, especially if red-shifted), many can be seen in the visible spectrum.

Here's the visible spectrum of the Sun. As you can see, there's plenty of dirty metals lurking within our nearest and dearest star. (Can you find sodium?  Hint: it's orange.)
Click here to embiggen.

Her Grace is best viewed in the visible spectrum.

Tuesday, 25 April 2017

U is for Ultraviolet

Yesterday we talked about lightbuckets and the light we can capture in them. Today we'll talk about one of those frequencies, Ultraviolet.  Most people know about ultraviolet from sunscreen commercials, and good old Slip Slop Slap campaigns.

In 1800 Herschel discovered Infrared (he called them Caloric Rays because they felt warm). Like any good scientist, he wondered if something similar could be found on the violet end of the spectrum. Alas, when he set up his thermometer on beyond violet, he didn't detect any heat. Oh well, he said, and focused on what he knew.

Then in 1801 Johann Wilhelm Ritter refused to be daunted by the violet end of the spectrum. See, he'd read Herschel's paper, and thought that Herschel hadn't gone far enough in his investigations. As a chemist he was familiar with the photosensitivity of certain chemicals. He knew that silver chloride turned dark when exposed to sunlight, reacting stronger to blue light, rather than red.

When he exposed a piece of paper coated with silver chloride to a spectrum, he discovered the strongest reaction was in the “invisible” side of violet light. Because of the chemical reaction, he named this invisible band of light “deoxidizing rays” or “chemical rays”. Essentially, he was one of the first to create a "photo-graph", or a literal recording of light.

He'd discovered Ultraviolet.

But what he also discovered was ionising radiation.

The electromagnetic band is divided into two different kinds of radiation: non-ionising waves, like radio waves, and ionising radiation, like X-rays.

Ionising radiation is radiation that's strong enough to knock electrons off an atom or molecule. The ability to cause a reaction in a chemical such as silver chloride is due to ionisation. It's the scary stuff that can potentially damage DNA and cause cancer.

Fortunately, most of the harmful ionising radiation (from UV on up to gamma rays) gets filtered out by our atmosphere. Still, visible light and some near UV get through. These are the frequencies that start to chemically affect stuff. (This is also why you don't store your beer in sunlight.)

Non-ionising radiation like radio waves can pass through our atmosphere, but doesn't pose a threat to us. (FYI, the radio wavelengths that mobile phones use is safely in the radio waves range. Mobile Phones do not cause cancer. Feel free to carry them in your bra.)

Ah, so what's the benefit of the ultraviolet spectrum in astronomy? It's good for detecting hotter objects. UV is very good for detecting chemical composition, very old stars or very young stars, and for identifying star-forming regions, which denotes active galaxies.

This UV images of the Andromeda Galaxy (M31) shows it's active star-forming areas:

When the variable star Mira was imaged in UV by GALEX in 2006, scientists were amazed to discover it had a tail. Mira moves through space rather quickly for a star (130km/s), so fast, it even has a bit of bow shock in the interstellar medium (ISM) and a tail of matter streaming behind it for thirteen lightyears:

Her Grace likes to think of UV as the "hot and bothered" frequency.

Monday, 24 April 2017

T is for Telescope

The Universe is full of light. Therefore, if we want to know more about the Universe, we need to sample some of that light for analysis. One of the best ways to capture that light is in a lightbucket called a telescope.

For thousands of years astronomers only had one method of capturing light--MK-1 Eyeball, aka the naked eye. Look up in the sky, what do you see?

Lots of stars, most of the major planets and a few other fuzzy objects were easily observable with the naked eye. It had its limitations, as it only detected wavelength between 390 to 700 nm. Also, it was limited in its resolution and the number of photons it could capture.

For a few thousand years humans knew that carving glass into certain shapes could bend light, focusing it, bringing more photons to the human eyeball. Then really recently, in the early 1600's, a few bright sparks put a couple of lenses in a tube, looked through and yelped, "Wow! I can see far! Tele-scope!" The first refracting telescope was born. Thomas Harriot thought it would be nifty to look at the sky through this thing. He was right. To him, the Moon looked awesome. He could see such detail!

Galileo and his refractor.
About the same time, Galileo built his own and looked upwards. To his amazement, he found four moons orbiting Jupiter. These details were not visible previously. The ability of the telescope to capture more photos and resolve very distant objects was totally amazing.

Newton's reflecting telescope.
Humans are lots of fun because they'll take an idea and run with it, seeing if they can improve on the original design. Another bright spark (some guy named Newton) wondered if a parabolic mirror could serve just as well for focusing the light. Sure enough, it worked wonders.

So lots of gentleman scientists played with this new tele-scope technology, improving it in size and quality, and peered into the heavens with it. At first, it was mostly planets they stared at, and various nebulae, as the stars were too far away to resolve to anything but points of light.

That didn't stop them from having fun with the light they captured. Prisms were notorious for breaking plain light up into pretty rainbows called spectra (singular: spectrum). When that happened, they then discovered things like absorption lines, infrared,  and ultraviolet.

You can go really big with radio telescopes,
like they did in Arecibo.
The infrared and ultraviolet discoveries really sparked some imagination. Could there really be "invisible" light beyond the visible spectrum? If so, could we capture it?


With lower frequencies such as radio waves, they discovered they could be captured with antennas. Later, radio dishes (very similar in shape to the parabolic mirrors used to capture light) helped focus radio waves onto the receiving antenna, instead of just trying to pick up any old radio wave that happened to bounce by, like the aerials on our rooftops.

X-ray telescopes, same thing. A large parabolic mirror focuses X-ray wavelengths onto an X-ray detector. Problem with X-ray telescopes is that they're rather useless on Earth, as our atmosphere blocks out most stellar X-rays. So if we wanna gather X-rays, we've got to put our light buckets into orbit.
X-ray telescopes, like the Athena X-ray Observatory, can have lots of fun capturing the emissions of X-ray sources from orbit.

By the end of the 20th Century, humankind had come up with all kinds of telescopes to observe different kinds of electromagnetism. We're very good at capturing photons of all wavelengths, studying them, and thus, through sheer observation alone, we know about our Universe.

Do you have a telescope? If not, have you had a chance to look through one? If you haven't, see if you can find a local star party. Many planetariums and astronomical clubs hold them regularly. I recommend waiting a few months for Saturn to rise, for that is one spectacular planet to look at through a telescope.

Her Grace observes through a Celestron Nexstar 130SLT 5" reflector.

Saturday, 22 April 2017

S is for Star

S is for Star, and really, you cannot talk about astronomy without mentioning stars. Impossible.

Anyone who's ever expressed the slightest interest in astronomy does so because of stars.  You look up in the sky, see the stars, and go, "Cool!" Stars are what get us interested in space.

Here's an earworm to annoy you for the rest of the day, "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" (the astronomically correct version):

Stars are the most obvious part of the universe because they shine so brightly along all the electromagnetic spectrum. I consider them a key component of the cosmos. They are the movers and the shakers. They are responsible for all the "metals" (ie elements heavier than H and He) out there. E V E R Y T H I N G out there that's not Hydrogen/Helium, is because of stars.

As you know, hydrogen makes up a good three-quarters of the universe. When that hydrogen (usually in a nebula) gets enough gravity to collapse together, fusion starts and you get a star.

Vital Stats of Stars


Stars range in weight (measured in solar masses or M) from about approximately 0.2 M  to humongous beasts pushing 150 M. Now, that might not seem like a very big range, seeing that one solar mass (M) equals the weight of our Sun at 1.98855 × 1030 kg. But if you look at the radii of these stars, the smallest is about 20% wider than Jupiter, but the biggest is a whopping 1500 times as wide as our Sun. Frickin' huge.

Here's a size comparison:

Also, the bigger a star, the faster it burns through its hydrogen. Really, really big hypergiants have been known to live for the brief moments of a few million years. Living fast, dying young, they leave a really impressive supernova/hypernova before letting its corpse collapse into a neutron star or even a black hole.

Smaller stars last a lot longer. Our own Sun will live about 10 billion years, whereas some red dwarfs could possibly live for trillions of years.

OGLE-TR-122b is the smallest main sequence star we've discovered so far that's still fusing hydrogen. If it got any smaller, it wouldn't have enough gravity to ignite fusion. Unless you're fusing, you ain't a star.


Stars range in colour, which also correlates with temperature.

Stars are classified according to colour(temperature), with blue stars being the hottest and red stars being the coolest.

The spectra of star types. See how the spectra peak in certain colour ranges? That's why stars appear coloured.

Blue O-type stars tend to be 30-40,000 Kelvin.
Blue-white B-types are 20,000 K,
White A and F stars are about 8-10,000 K
G-type stars, like our yellow Sun, are about 6000 K
Red K and M-type stars can be as cool as 3000 K  (For reference, you are around 310 K).

Look up in the night sky and see if you can tell what colour a star is? While most of them appear "white", compare nearby stars to see if you can detect a faint bluish cast or reddish cast.  Betelgeuse in Orion is distinctively red, as is Antares in Scorpio. Rigel in Orion is rather blue.

Why aren't there any green stars?

Actually, there are. Any "white" star is actually radiating in the green part of the visible (optical) spectrum. Green happens to be right in the middle of the spectrum, so when a star is emitting green, it also emits red and blue. Combine all these together (additive colours), and they look white. Our Sun, a G2-type star is generally classified as Yellow-White. But if white is really green, that makes our Sun a yellow-green star. (Consider how much green light gets reflected by plants on Earth. That light's gotta come from somewhere.)

Birth and Death of a Star

So, a star is born from the gas of a nebula. After it gets over its initial teething phase, it settles into the Main Sequence, happily fusing its hydrogen into helium. It'll spend about 90% of its life like this.

Once it runs out of hydrogen, they move off the main sequence, do a few interesting things (like helium flashes, variable pulsing, puffing up like balloons), then die.

When it comes to the death of stars, the manner of its demise depends on its mass.  For smaller mass stars, like our Sun, it'll inflate into a red giant, then with a gentle poof, shed its outer layers, leaving the cooling cinder of a white dwarf.

But if it's a massive star, especially of the live-fast-die-young category, it starts fusing everything into onion layers of elements until it reaches iron. Once that happens, fusion stop, the pressure keeping the star puffy ceases, the star collapses in on itself, rebounds, and dies most violently B A N G!! in a  spectacular supernova.

Don't let the gentle spread of this light echo fool you. This time-lapse covers a period of four years. The light echo is about six light years across. We're talking some serious velocities here.

The energy released in this explosion is enough to start a new wave of nuclear reactions that fuses iron into the higher elements like gold and uranium and blowing them out into the universe.

Whatever is left over gets fused into neutrons and collapses down into either a neutron star or a black hole in the middle of a brand new nebula.

Meanwhile, the shockwave of a supernova can extend for several parsecs, rolling through any neighbourhood nebular clouds of hydrogen, possibly triggering some of it to collapse into new stars.

And thus, the cycle begins again.

Some people just like looking up in the skies. And that's okay. Do you have any favourite stars?  What make them your favourites?  I'm fond of Betelgeuse and Canopus.

No hardcore stuff today, unless you want to investigate more about V838 Mon which occurred in 2002.

Her Grace is sometimes content just to stare up at the stars with MK-1 eyeballs.

Friday, 21 April 2017

R is for Radio Waves

Since everything in the Universe is so terribly far away, the only way we can science it is through observation. Fortunately, we have the Electromagnetic Spectrum, which can tell us all sorts of things.

At the high end we have the powerful, ionising wavelengths of X-rays and gamma rays, and at the low end we have the more zen-like non-ionising wavelengths such as microwaves and radio waves. All these different wavelengths interact with baryonic matter in different ways. This difference gives us an advantage in astronomy. For example, Earth's atmosphere will block gamma rays but will allow radio waves through.

This makes radio waves both ideal and infernal for ground-based astronomy.

If you tune your car radio in between the official broadcasting stations and listen to the static, some of static comes from the universe. (Radio static is how they discovered the Cosmic Microwave Background, or the radio wave echo of the Big Bang.) Sounds like this:

The atmosphere isn't uniformly transparent to radio waves, because our atmosphere is a rather complex thing. Some frequencies will shoot straight through, others will bounce around. This bouncing around can cause interference, which you can detect on your car radio as static.

The closer you are to population centres, the stronger the radio will be, because we have radio broadcasters and mobile phone cell towers and all sorts of radio-bright sources.  Also, humidity in the atmosphere can block out radio waves.

So, what's an astronomer to do? The best earth-based radio astronomy sites are those away from civilisation, out where it's dry (low humidity) and "radio-quiet".  Western Australia has a Radio Quiet Zone  in the Murchison (our gratitude to the Wajarri Yamatji people, the traditional owners of this land) for the Square Kilometer Array, a large radio telescope. http://skatelescope.org/

Don't think that radio astronomy is out of reach for the amateur astronomers and citizen scientists. There are plenty of amateur radio astronomy clubs and organisations throughout the world.

But if you don't want to go hardcore and build your own radio telescope, you can still experience radio astronomy. If you tune your radio to the frequency of 1420 MHz (that's 1420 AM), you could listen to the hydrogen of the Universe speak to you. Sounds like this.

Spectral lines from other radio-sensitive stuff are detectable in radio astronomy:

  • 1400 - 1427 MHz: 21cm hydrogen line
  • 22.01 - 22.5 GHz: Water
  • 23.6 - 24.0 GHz: Ammonia
  • 36.43 - 36.5 GHz: Hydrogen cyanide and Hydroxil
  • 72.77 - 72.91 GHz: Formaldehyde

More about how radio astronomy works.

Here's some pictures of stuff in radio frequencies.

Galaxy M51 (Whirlpool Galaxy) in radio and optical:

The planet Jupiter is also radio-bright:

Galaxy M87 showing off a radio-bright jet from its supermassive black hole:

The Sun in optical, radio and X-ray:

Galaxy M31 (Andromeda Galaxy) in radio and visible. Radio has a way of shining through the dust that would normally block visible light. This is one of the advantages of radio astronomy.

What the Milky Way looks like at 408 MHz:

Radio astronomy, indeed astronomy in all the wavelengths provides astronomers with a different point of view.

Her Grace once observed the universe through a mate's homemade radio telescope. It looked an awful lot like a silver umbrella attached to a laptop, because it was.

Thursday, 20 April 2017

Q is for Quasar

In the middle of the 20th Century, astronomers were astounded to find a very bright radio source--stunningly bright. In fact, they were brighter than anything else previously known  (or since, really).  They called them Quasi-stellar Objects (QSOs).

But what were they? Astronomers captured their spectra and had a look. The spectra looked really odd, until they figured out that they were extremely redshifted. Redshift is a nifty astronomy tool. Here's how it works:

Original spectrum    vs   a redshifted spectrum
See the absorption lines in the rainbow spectrum on the left? This is a normal spectrum where some of the light has been absorbed by an element (say, hydrogen and its Balmer Lines).  When the light that makes this spectrum comes from very far away, the expansion of the universe stretches it out and makes the frequency drop. The result is the spectrum on the right, where the absorption lines move in a red-ward direction. This is redshift. Think Doppler Effect.

The greater the redshift, the farther away an object is. The spectrum sampled from quasars were so redshifted it took us a while to figure out just how redshifted they were.

In other words, these really bright radio sources were really, really far away. That was doubly-amazing because of the Inverse Square Law--intensity reduces with distance.

"Dude!" we cried.  What could possibly create so much energy to be so bright from so far away?

Eventually, we figured out quasars were really, really active distant galaxies and that the extreme energy output came from the accretion disks of the  supermassive black holes in the middle of those galaxies. Those suckers can really put on a shine when actively consuming some poor star.

(Is our own Milky Way a quasar? Currently no, as our Sagittarius A* is a rather quiet supermassive black hole at the moment.) Quasars are believed to be an early universe phenomenon because we observe them as coming from waaay back in time. But that doesn't mean that Sgr A* couldn't become a quasar in the future, given enough to eat.

So we figured out that quasars are:
  • really old
  • really distant
  • really bright
Once we established that, we realised they could be used as a kind of anchor point in mapping of the skies. See, the farther away something is, the less likely it is to apparently move.

Want to know more about quasars?

Her Grace prefers to study objects that are a little bit closer than z=7.085.

Wednesday, 19 April 2017

Using Singing to Create a Positive Emotional Benefit

We haven't had a TASE (Talk About Something Else) Day in a while. We're overdue.

A friend is teaching a child how to master their emotions. Like all good researchers, she asked her peers for their experiences.  I suggested singing as a quick and immediate method the child could use to get themself out of an emotional rut like frustration or anger.

I've always known singing to be a positive mood-lifter, far more effective than just listening to music. I've taught classes in using singing for optimism, and often teach my regular music students how to use music for their emotional benefit. (A bit of a selfish purpose behind this one as well, for if a child learns to love creating music, they'll be more likely to practice.)

Not everyone is a musician, but I believe everyone is capable of singing. You might be a bad singer and woefully out of tune, but you can still sing, and you will still receive the benefits I list below. Never let anyone tell you you shouldn't sing. I refuse to oppress a singer just because they might not have learned to master their pipes yet.

Anyone who's sung out loud may have noticed the centering effect music has. Really, it works, so here I go hardcore with research to explain how this works.

Singing can alter your mood through:

  • Employing deep and focused breathing. To sing, one must first draw breath, then release it in a focused and controlled manner to make sound. This deep breathing can also slow heart rate and neural activity. It also provides re-focus, as the brain must concentrate on producing music. Also, the vibrations of music has an effect on the autonomic nervous system. (Clark & Tamplin 2016)  
  • Triggering endorphin release. While merely listening to music can make us feel better, the actual performance, whether playing an instrument or singing, has the greater benefit. It requires the singer to be active and not just passive, as a listener would be. This activity stimulates greater endorphin release. (Dunbar et al 2012)(Kreutz G et al 2004) 
  • Using a different part of the brain. This disengages the "stuck" brain and engages fresh thinking, which will be less likely to get stuck in a feedback loop. Singing also engages the same part of the brain that processes emotions. Take that over, and the negative emotions are easier to deal with and get over. (Chanda et al 2013) Also helps with stuttering and emotion-related speech issues, like an inability to explain oneself when upset.
  • Familiarity. As our common rituals and favourite things soothe us all, the familiarity of a favourite song can also bring us back to ourselves when we feel out of sorts. (Ibid)

So, how does one get this singing schtick to beat off the black dogs?

  • Before you find yourself in an emotional bucket o' crap, choose a positive song or ten to be part of your emotional first-aid kit. I've got several, but one that works really well for me is "Before the Parade Passes By" from the musical "Hello Dolly".  Get in the habit of singing your first-aid kit songs now and then so you can get used to how they feel in your chest.
  • When you find yourself down or frustrated or angry, pull out the song that "feels right" for the moment, and start singing, even if you don't feel like it. If you're not really in a place you can sing out loud and can't get to one, humming is also acceptable. But if you can do some proper out-loud singing, the deep breathing will do you much good.
  • Do not let whatever harshed your original mellow steal the focus from your song. You're here to beat the grief, not let it beat you.  (3/4 or 4/4 are good beats.)  Singing won't solve your original problem, but it will resettle your brain enough for you to have more spoons with which to cope.

Barbara Streisand singing "Before the Parade Passes By".

I am interested to hear results from anyone who's willing to experiment on this method and report back.


Clark IN & Tamplin J (2016) "How Music Can Influence the Body: Perspectives From Current Research" Voices, 16, 2

Dunbar RI, Kaskatis K, MacDonald I, Barra V (2012) "Performance of music elevates pain threshold and positive affect: implications for the evolutionary function of music", Evolutionary Psychology, 10, 4

Kreutz G, Bongard S, Rohrmann S, Hodapp V, Grebe D (2004) "Effects of choir singing or listening on secretory immunoglobulin A, cortisol, and emotional state" Journal of Behavioural Medicine, 27, 6

Chanda ML & Levitiin DJ (2013) "The neurochemistry of music (A meta study)" Trends in Cognitive Science, 17, 4

Her Grace is a Coloratura Mezzo-Soprano by training, though her voice has gone a little smokier with age.